Wolverine

Wolverine must have a hard time meeting women, for obvious reasons. One imagines a conversation something like this:

"Oooh look at those claws! They're not going to hurt me are they?"
"No, no no. They only come out when I'm annoyed."
"Oh good."
"But you would not believe the list of stuff that pisses me off."

It's true. So, in order to prevent prospective partners from effectively committing suicide, here is a list of things that piss Wolverine off:

1. People chewing within earshot.
2. Racism.
3. Certain shades of pastel green.
4. People who have names containing the letter A or the letter T.
5. Children (excepting those named "Rogue")(and "Jubilee" © Amanda).
6. Time travel.
7. Obvious homosexuals.
8. Sweden.
9. Car number plates which add up to a prime number.
10. Light-hearted tomfoolery.
11. Calico.
12. Magnets.
13. Cartoon animals. (© Philip Kehoe)
14. The postal service (the mail delivery system, not the band).
15. Foreign or non-standard keyboards.
16. Amish people.
17. Smug bank staff.
18. Train or bus timetables.
19. The Eurovision Song Contest.
20. Pretend lesbians.
21. Hello Kitty merchandise (© Philip Kehoe).
22. The Postal Service (the band).
23. Musicals.
24. Someone saying "You know they just came out with ass implants -- they're not that expensive." (© Lisa)
25. (your suggestion to solo1@eircom.net)

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